A Mother's fit

I have to get this documented for a couple of reasons.

1) I'm a talker, and the more I talk about things, the more I can sort through it and move on from it.

2) I have to be able to laugh at myself and some of the decisions I make ( and hopefully limit the amount of times I do dumb stuff in the future )

It happens about once a month <--- I'm not in denial about why this happens, not at all... my mental stability is questionable. I know it's happening, I even provide warnings to those that need them, or rather understand them, and do my best to lay low.

Well, the other night, I was trying to lay low and I even had a plan to make that happen. It was a great plan if I do say so myself. I wanted to cuddle with my husband. I wanted his big strong arms around me to calm me down and make me feel better like only he can. It's the simple things. I didn't even need to be alone, I just needed him to myself!!

The kids wouldn't hear of it. Not even close. They wanted him too. Trust me, there is a reason why we all want to cuddle with him. He's like a big teddy bear that keeps you safe and warm.

Well instead of appreciating the joy that my kids have in the bonding time they have with their dad, I got defensive and frankly quite territorial. I questioned my poor young children for wanting something only because I had it first. I asked them why they didn't think I deserved a few minutes of him to myself, and why they couldn't just go to bed like they have done on recent nights. I even said... prepare yourselves now... " I had him first, I just loan him to you when I'm busy! " Yes. Those words came out of my mouth. I clung to Robert while they tried to climb on top of him and while Jack even cried slightly complaining that my arm was on Robert's stomach ( Jack's prime spot. ) I refused to budge. REFUSED. I knew while this was happening that it was ridiculous, but I NEEDED it. I really really needed it, right then, on MY time - not theirs. Even for just 10 minutes, it needed to be on MY time.

Well, all 5 of us ended up together on our bed. They smashed their way into any area they could fit ( Kade at the foot of the bed ) and took back their territory. Stubborn little people!! I have no idea where they get that trait from. ;)

Kade crashed out first, so I got up and moved him. Kyla then complained that she didn't have enough room ( ya think? ) and said, "I'll just go to my own bed" like it was her idea, and Jack crashed last. I moved him too.

I went back to MY bed, MY space, and MY husband - who was now snoring away and making it nearly impossible for me to fall asleep anyway. I knew that was going to happen because I even told the kids that I needed to hurry and fall asleep before he started to snore.

If this was a contest of will, I definitely do not declare myself the winner. I fell asleep half laughing and half ashamed.....

Until next month, when I'm sure to have a variation of the above.